personal responsibility

AMA with Hannah Aline Taylor. Wednesday 2/4 at 4:00 PM CT

love, boundaries, and mistakes in relating, community, and peopling together (+ thank god love doesn’t look like you expect it to)

Responsibility & Pests. I have very little sense of what I'm meant to do on UpTrust so I'm just going to do something imperfect and refine from here...

My dog presently has fleas. Historically when this has happened I give him a bath, apply a topical, and don't have to think about it again. This time, that wasn't enough. The dog has fleas, my house has fleas. (I sort of have fleas! Ick)

Of course, this coincides with a period of time when I'm more 'in' with community and committed to hosting than any time since the pandemic. People come to my home with linens, massage tables, floor mats, and everyone is rolling around on the floor and giving each other back rubs. (An event I call 'touchcraft.')

This is likely not a coincidence, but causal. It is probably all the new linens and belongings and people that lead to this level of new exposure, and therefore, new safety protocols/cleaning protocols. The dog will go on the monthly preventatives. Everything will be laundered/vacuumed/treated.

Meanwhile a neighbor in my building whom I'm friendly with thinks this is somehow a landlord responsibility, that I should get building management to pay for cleaning and fumigation. This seems incorrect to me... that this is one component of managing a house that seems like a maintenence/cleanliness/personal risk assessment issue. I chose the guests, I chose the dog, I deal with the fallout. 

As I research the issue I can see that this comes up frequently. Pests are seen as a recurrent problem in low income housing, the fault of deadbeat 'slumlord' type landlords who won't deal with habitability issues. But, concurrently, when I talk to friends who own properties they seem more inclined to point the finger at lifestyle problems of tenants.

Repeatedly there is a question, when an issue arises, of who must do the labor and take on the costs of fixing the issue.

Anyway, I'm doing lots and lots of laundry today. Hot water, staging the cleaned things in sealed plastic bags. Choosing which room will be the 'clean room.' Heinous. And shameful, somehow? Like having pests isn't just a sign that I'm a human contending with problems all humans do, but that I'm an especially unhygenic one, or something? This is a fleeting voice, and combatable, but it's here.

If anyone has tips, I'm open. 

I love... What do you love? What comes up when you "finish the sentence stem"?

#hearttakes